Kind of a unique situation: myself and almost my entire player pool are all relatively-recently come out (largely as trans women and all as queer orientations), and we’ve all expressed some nervousness about going over similar struggles again in play when all those scars are still pretty fresh for us.
Any advice for keeping out the uncomfortable kind of bleed? Does it violate too much of the spirit of the game to invoke the Asexuality rules and have characters who are explicitly gay?
Violate the spirit of the game? I get why you would ask this, but I think the part of the spirit of monsterhearts is safety. The queerness of the game seems to me to be about fighting against heteronormativity. Choosing an all het group, cuz “gay stuff is icky” would be a violation of the spirit of the game. An all queer game is a different angle but not problem.
I think if you can run the game in a way that everyone has fun and feels safe exploring their characters in the way they want, then you win.
I’d recommend using the X Card, too, so your players understand they have the power to reverse anything that hurts.
Yeah the X card and steering away from content that would be discomforting is totes legit. i mean there are tons of other areas in the messy lives of teenage monsters to pull from.
also it seems like a fine time to mention this resource Avery wrote.
buriedwithoutceremony.com – buriedwithoutceremony.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/safe-hearts.pdf
I think my fear is that the whole point of MH is about the sort of uncomfortable and shifting nature of sexuality, and I worry that having a set identity, even a queer one, makes me feel like I’m dodging the core of the game.
I’ve played a monsterhearts game where we all agreed before we started that we were exhausted of homophobia and just wanted a break, so maybe for this one game let’s say that queerness doesn’t violate the social norms of this particular setting. We brainstormed other axes of oppression to explore that game, and it was fine; it still had the emotional realness I expect from a game of Monsterhearts. And then we emerged refreshed and more ready to examine more-personal traumas the next time. I wouldn’t want to play like that all the time, because queerness is a central principle of the game, but as a one-time palate-cleanser it was refreshing.
I was emotionally abused as a child and I find child abuse intensely triggering for me, so I X-card all that stuff out ahead of time. The game definitely still functions. No one’s gonna kick down your apartment door and demand you do some shit that makes you uncomfortable in your game, nor should they.
i do not feel like there would be an issue with characters who are explicitly gay, as long as there are other aspects of their identities that are in flux. and that does not have to be the sexuality and gender related aspects of their identity, it could be anything. it could be related to subcultures and friend groups, or religion or politics, or any sort of thing as long as who they are is in flux in some way.
if you want to avoid dealing with the oppression and discrimination that comes with queerness irl, you are definitely going to need to find another axis of oppression to focus on though – maybe one that hits less close to home – because a big theme of the game is interacting with and dealing with oppression and discrimination and all of that messy stuff that monsterhearts is in many ways about.
i would definitely suggest trying it the standard way when the scars are less fresh though, because those topics do enhance the game a fair amount. monsterhearts is designed to provide a kind of cathartic and almost therapeutic look at those experiences. it is about playing out those experiences and expressing and working through your feelings about those experiences in a safe setting. i am by no means suggesting you try it that way immediately if you and your group do not feel comfortable or prepared for that right now, but it is something to consider down the line, you know? 🙂
My 2Cents, I experienced in my Country (Italy) a RPGI-CON (Inclusive Role Play Game, where many Queer Player act as Game Master with Queer Adventures to fight Homophobia and Eterostereotypes…and it was SOOOO COOOL) so Bleed apart, spread love with Gaming ! And have a really good new monster year.