So, this is a thing I’ve been working on for a bit.

16 thoughts on “So, this is a thing I’ve been working on for a bit.”

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3. Dang, I just wrote a really long comment, but it got eaten. So I’m gonna post feedback in parts, alright?

4. Did a monster eat it?

5. System Choice:

   This is a great use of PbtA: The idea of players versus impossible odds fits the feel that a partial success mechanic gives off very well. Unfortunately, I’m not finding all of the charming parts that are usually packaged with it. The next few parts will cover those charming bits that will make your game that much better.

6. Character Creation:

   One of the best things about PbtA is its ability to inspire players using lists, especially during character creation. What I would suggest, therefore, is to invest some time in figuring out common but interesting names and nicknames for players to pick, and then give them a blank space so they can write their own if they want. The same should be applied to Look. Remember: character creation is the most important part of any RPG, as it has to introduce the history, culture, and mechanics of your world, while also hooking players into giving the game their full attention, creating memorable play.

7. Moves:

   Since the moves are explained in the player reference sheet, my only suggestion is deleting the moves that increase stats by 1, as that encourages power playing over the narrative, which should always be the focus.

8. Jon Stewart

   There’s separate references for the moves (should all be in the linked folder, let me know if you’re not seeing them?).

9. Nerve and Journey:

   These are awesome. Seriously, well done. They have all the charm I was talking about before, while offering interesting alternatives to XP and levels. Only suggestion I have is that “Creating Your Journey” could be explained in half the amount of words. In all honesty, though, I might just steal this for my games…

10. Jon Stewart

    Thanks!

    Re: character names. The intent setting wise is for the players to take a chunk of contemporary earth and plop a bunch of giant monsters in. Do you think this needs elaboration outside of what’s in the main rules doc? I’ve thought about name lists, but I’m not sure how to reconcile that with the breadth of setting (could be North America, could be Africa, could be South-East Asia, etc.). I’ve found in playtesting that once players have their journey in mind, they generally have an idea of what that character should look like.

    Thoughts?

11. GM Reference Sheet:

    More great stuff. As I said before, work on the moves. Also, some words and phrases (“maybe”, “If you must know”, etc) aren’t very professional, though that’s honestly just a personal preference of mine. If you want your rules to have spunk, like ApocWorld, then by all means keep this type of language.

12. Player Reference Sheet:

    Wow! I’m an idiot. Sorry for not reading everything before posting this review! You literally clear up so many of many previous points with this doc.

13. Alright, that’s it. Over all, good stuff.

14. Jon Stewart

    As I said at the midpoint (in case you missed it while writing), thanks! Appreciate the feedback, hopefully going to be taking a look over a few of the details this weekend.

15. Sorry, I didn’t catch those other comments while writing.

    Re: Names

    It wasn’t very clear to me that there would be world building as well as character creation. While I see that’s probably the purpose of the “Think About” part of the GM Reference Sheet, it’d probably be good to add an explanation that the players and GM will be making the world before making characters.

16. Jon Stewart

    There’s some explanation about it in the main text, but yeah…it warrants having some mention in the references/playbooks, since it is part of getting started. Could probably fit a bit into both the GM reference and the character books.

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