Made a few changes to my #Destiny-inspired hack, #(a)Risen. Have Paths and Basic Moves complete. Went with 3 path moves instead of 5 — actually results in more flexibility and variety, and real choices to be made. Also got Racial moves — a good start, but I need more I think.
Working on Classes and character creation next, then Harm, Healing, and Advancement, and then extra details and play guides.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1TxiA_aaByknq3Wm-fViHNq6GuTW1hui7OvwriZ_pUQc/edit?usp=sharing
First things first, it’s your project, for you above all, so screw the critics!
That said, I’m not a fan of your stats. Alliteration is confusing visually. Plus, war is actually all about training and discipline. Your description is more like instinctual stuff.
I’d go with Instinct, Clarity, Will, Presence and Strange or maybe Mean, Smart, Tough, Cool and Alien.
Now for classes, I’m not messing, I think it’d be neat if you just gave them classic DnD-like names. So for your original three, it’d be Knight, Rogue, Mage. In my mind I can easily link what they are narratively with what like look like in a futurist environment.
I’d also add the fundamental fantasy classes to fill out the roster: Ranger, Barbarian, Cleric, Monk. You can pull some neat twists by daring to use these archetypes.
What is a barbarian in a galaxy so hi-tech teleporters and rayguns are mundane?
What does a cleric worship when medicine is so advanced people only die to combat?
I’m picturing a futurist travelling monk means a hermit in their own little spaceship, meditating in the orbit of a dying star.
Moving on, I think it’d be neat if racial moves ignored species. Like, felens and humans can be mentioned in the lore and such, but how about this:
Synthetic: Your mind is digital, downloaded into a mechanical frame. The racial move for each class will reflect logic, precision, intelligence and networking.
Organic: You’re flesh and blood. The racial moves are about passion, gut instinct, endurance and adaptability.
Amorphic: You’re either designed for a harsh environment and look totally inhuman, or you’re in the process of transcending the material world. The racial moves are all about the magic, the unseen, the darkness between the stars.
Final thought, I hope Paths have tenets, rules, stuff that makes players act a certain way. Powers are fine, but without narrative meaning you’d be better off making a war-game with miniatures.
Awesome advice! Thank you.
I always planned on adding in more classes down the road, but I wanted to start with the basic three to see how they felt. I figured if I couldn’t make the game and what it provides feel cohesive with just the three standard archetypes, I had work to do before I went and added more.
I see where you’re coming from regarding nomenclature, and I’ll definitely keep that in mind (alliteration, class names). For the time being, I’m going to keep them as-is since they match my notes (I have several pages of hand-written stuff I’ve been jotting down), but when I’m finished with the first draft I’ll be looking at it from that angle to see what can be improved.
I do agree about War, though, and the way the flavor text sounds. I can definitely make an adjustment there.
Paths are going to be way more fictionally geared than what it looks like so far. I’m planning to remove the thing about types of move tiers (grenade type, shield type, etc.), because that’s going to A) be obvious, B) be unimportant to actually say, and C) be open to interpretation. It’ll be a series of space-magic Moves with some similarities strung throughout but with widely different effects in the end.
Lastly, I think that’s a rad idea about racial moves. I never liked marrying them to class, so I wanted to just create a pool of bonus moves players could pick from that represented choosing a race. In true PbtA/DW fashion, your suggestion helps keep it far more open.
I’m thinking a slew of racial moves, everybody picks just one (with the option of getting more if it becomes fictionally apropos), and then describes their species. In a separate section, perhaps I can describe “just some” of the known factions and species to get people thinking.
So:
Synthetic, Eyeshine (nightvision), Prehensile Tail (helps with fictional positioning, some neat tricks), Many-Limbed (can do things that would normally take two people), Thick Hide (+1 armor even without armor), Amorphous, etc. I’ll try to come up with a good, balanced spread.
I like te W’s. Keep it.
Hey you, gimme a basic move from your hack. I am shaking my fist right now, you just can’t see it.
War Moves
Exchange Fire
When you move into danger and exchange fire with the enemy, Roll+War and exchange Harm. On a 10+, choose 3. On a 7-9, choose 2.
• Overheat or empty your weapon and deal double its Harm
• Exercise caution and suffer -1 Harm
• Hold a position or halt an advance
• Make an advance or force an enemy out of cover
• Stun or stagger your target
• Get out of direct fire and have a moment to recover
• Provide covering fire for an ally (they have Advantage going forward)
Advanced Exchange Fire
On a 12+, your bravado impresses, frightens, or dismays the enemy. Either they are stunned or staggered, and you automatically suffer -1 Harm (ignore the stun or stagger option. You may still take the -1 Harm option for a total of -2), OR ignore all other options and take no Harm (they are still impressed or dismayed).
Exchange Blows
When you engage in hand-to-hand or melee combat with the enemy, Roll+War and exchange Harm. On a 10+ choose 2. On a 7-9, just exchange Harm.
• Deal +1 Harm
• Act defensively and suffer -1 Harm
• You are able to disengage and retreat back to cover
• You force the enemy to give ground or fall back under your attack
• You stun or stagger your target
Advanced Exchange Blows
On a 12+, your martial skill impresses, frightens, or dismays the enemy. They are stunned or staggered, and you automatically suffer -1 Harm (ignore the stun or stagger option. You may still take the -1 Harm option for a total of -2), OR ignore all other options and take no Harm (they are still impressed or dismayed).
Exchange Words
When you threaten, bully, or intimidate somebody into doing what you want, Roll+War. On a 10+, they choose 1:
• Refuse, and force you to follow through on the threat
• Give you what you want
On a 7-9, they can choose 1 of these instead:
• Take cover or get out of your way
• Hunker down and mount a solid defense
• Give you something they think you want
• Tell you something they think you want to hear
• Attempt to de-escalate and look for an exit
On a 6-, your threat falls flat and you have Disadvantage going forward against them.
Advanced Exchange Words
Strike the miss from this Move. Treat 6- Rolls as 7-9.
Wise Moves
Take Aim
When you shoot or attack a target that can’t attack back, Roll+Wise and deal your Harm. On a 10+, choose 1. On a 7-9, just deal your Harm.
• You disarm or disable them
• Your position isn’t exposed or compromised
• It’s a particularly lethal blow. If your weapon can be overheated or discharged, do so and deal double its Harm. If not, deal +1 Harm
Advanced Take Aim
On a 12+, choose 2.
Spout Knowledge
When you consult your accumulated knowledge on a subject, Roll+Wise and ask a question related to the topic. On a 10+, the GM will give you a useful answer, or let you come up with your own. On a 7-9, the answer might not be useful, but it’s at least interesting. On a 6-, expect bad news.
Advanced Spout Knowledge
On a 12+, your knowledge extends. Ask 2 more questions.
Careful Read
When you take time to closely study a situation, object, creature, or person, Roll+Wise. On a 10+, ask 3 questions and have Advantage going forward when you act on the answers. On a 7-9, ask 1. On a 6-, ask 1, but you won’t like the answer. Take Disadvantage going forward.
• What happened here recently?
• What is about to happen?
• What here will give me an edge?
• Who’s really in control here?
• What here is not as it appears to be?
Advanced Careful Read
On a 12+, ask 4. On a 7-9, ask 2 and take Advantage going forward on your questions. On a 6-, you still won’t like the answer, but you can handle it: do not take Disadvantage.
Wit Moves
Think Fast, Move Fast
When you use your reflexes to get out of the way of danger or acrobatics to navigate difficult terrain, Roll+Wit. On a 10+, you pull it off, no problem. On a 7-9, you succeed, but you also hesitate, stumble, or flinch. Choose 1:
• You’re off-balance. Take Disadvantage going forward
• You’ve left something behind, the GM will tell you what
• You’re worse off than before and may need to act quickly again
• You’ve pushed yourself too hard. Mark 1 stress
Advanced Think Fast, Move Fast
On a 12+, you transcend the danger and impress, frighten, or dismay others. Take Advantage going forward.
Manipulate
When you negotiate for something you want, define the terms and Roll+Wit.
NPC’s choose 1
On a 10+:
• Accept your offer at face value and agree to the exchange
• Ask you to promise something, and they’ll do what you want if you agree
On a 7-9:
• They make a counter-offer to be settled now before they do what you want
• They ask you to promise something that needs concrete assurance, proof, or collateral that you’ll follow through before doing what you want
PC’s
On a 10+, both. On a 7-9, you choose 1:
• If they do it, they mark an Advance
• They have to Keep Calm and Carry On, at Disadvantage, to refuse
Advanced Manipulate
You’re an expert at getting out of a situation when it gets hairy. On a 6-, the disagreement doesn’t escalate to violence if you can come up with a sly way out.
Infiltrate
When you attempt to move stealthily through hostile territory, Roll+Wit. On a 10+, you’re like a ghost, hold 3. On a 7-9, hold 1. Spend hold to perform the following actions while remaining undetected:
• You cover your tracks or avoid pursuit
• You get close to someone or something
• You hide or conceal yourself
• You snatch, pocket, or conceal an item
If you choose to reveal yourself, you lose any remaining hold.
Advanced Infiltrate
On a 6-, you manage to start undetected, and may even stay that way — if you’re lucky. Further Rolls to avoid detection may be required.
Will Moves
Recover
When you hunker down and take a moment to gather yourself in a dangerous situation, Roll+Will and choose 2:
• Recharge a Move
• Reload or cool down a weapon
• Recharge a piece of Gear with the Recharge tag
• Use a medkit to recover Harm
• Gather Your Wits. Heal any Harm that requires you to Gather Your Wits
• Recharge your Wyrdish Aura
On a 7-9, the enemy gets a chance to move to a better position or prepare themselves.
Advanced Recover
On a 12+, you steel yourself to resume the fight. Take Advantage going forward.
Keep Calm and Carry On
When you keep calm under pressure or endure hardship, Roll+Will. On a 10+, you do it with minimal cost. On a 7-9, choose 1:
• You have Disadvantage going forward
• Suffer 1 Stress
On a 6-, choose both, or you suffer danger, hardship, or Harm.
Advanced Keep Calm and Carry On
On a 12+, your resolve is absolute. Impress, dismay, or frighten others, and take Advantage going forward.
Stand Tall
When you stand defiant to defend something or someone from harm, Roll+Will. On a 10+, hold 3. On a 7-9, hold 2. So long as you stand stalwart, spend hold 1 for 1 to:
• Redirect an attack from what you defend to yourself
• Reduce incoming Harm by 1
• Open up the attacker to an ally, giving that ally Advantage going forward against them
Advanced Stand Tall
On a 12+, you are the wall against which your enemies break. Add “Deal your Harm” to the list.
Wyrd Moves
Melee Shunt
When you empower your successful melee attack with the strength of your Wyrd, discharge any Path Move to fuel it and deal double your Harm, adding your current Path’s effects to your foe.
Advanced Melee Shunt
Even on a failed Exchange Blows, or when you’re attacked in melee and can’t attack back, the strength of your Wyrd strikes out against your attacker. Discharge a move and add your Path’s effects, but don’t deal any Harm.
Wyrdish Aura
When you suffer incoming harm, discharge this Move to negate the damage up to your Wyrd modifier +1 (one point, one Harm).
Resurrect
When you fall in battle, Roll+Wyrd and return to life. Perform the following:
• Erase your Stress track and mark a Scar
• Discharge any Path Moves you had ready, recharge your Wyrdish Aura
• Erase all Harm
• Forget something, and learn something. Explain what happened to you while you were gone
On a 10+:
• It doesn’t take too long, usually only a few minutes
• You forget your most recently learned Path Move
On a 7-9:
• It takes a while. An hour or more
• You forget an entire Path. Pick which one
• Reduce one Way by one. You may Advance it again later, even if you already had
On a 6-:
• It takes days. Your body, or what’s left of it, will need to be kept safe or returned to a Bastion
• You forget your current Path and one other, entirely. Erase all appropriate Path Moves
• Reduce all your Ways by one. They may be Advanced again later, even if you already had
Advanced Resurrect
On a 12+, you don’t actually die. Discharge any Path Moves you have available, and stand up in storm and fury. Enemies are terrorized and afflicted by your Wyrd, and you can soldier on. Erase only your most recent Harm — you’re wounded and may need help.
Got the first set of Path Moves done, for Psion.
Psion (Special Effect: Knockdown)
1. Vortex Grenade
When you lob an orb of psychic energy, Roll+Wyrd and Discharge this Move. On a hit, a powerful vortex is created that pulls people, creatures, and objects toward it. On a 10+, choose 3. On a 7-9, choose 1:
• It lasts until your next Recharge attempt (otherwise, only a few seconds)
• It lands where you want it to go (otherwise, it goes wild)
• It’s so powerful that people caught in it must fight desperately and still may not have the strength (otherwise, it pulls with the strength of heavy winds)
• When it ends, it explodes, throwing debris and dealing Harm
2. Repulsion Field
When you reinforce your aura with psychic energy, Roll+Wyrd and Discharge this Move. On a hit, you project a telekinetic field out from your location that is large enough to comfortably fit you and a few allies. It takes concentration to maintain and lasts only until the next time you Discharge any Move requiring your Wyrd, including your aura, for any reason. On a 10+, everything is turned away, including projectiles. On a 7-9, projectiles, inanimate objects, and foes may enter, but Moves made against them have Advantage as they struggle to withstand the repulsion field.
3. Telekinetic Lift
When you reach out with telekinetic force to lift a person or object, Discharge this Move. Your target is lifted several feet into the air. Choose 1:
• The target remains suspended until you Recharge (otherwise, just a few moments)
• Anybody else of roughly equal size Near the target is also lifted
• You can slam the target down to deal 1 Harm that ignores any armor and shield
4. Telekinetic Throw
When you propel a blast of psychic force at a nearby target, Discharge this Move and send them flying. Additionally, choose 1:
• They’re flung very far
• The force of the blast deals 1 Harm that ignores any armor and shield
• Everything caught in the blast is toppled, people and objects alike
5. Invade Minds
When you muster all your psychic power to invade the mind of another, Discharge all 5 Path Moves and plunder the thoughts of a target. Learn what the target is thinking at that moment, ask a question and get an honest answer, and then command them to take any simple and immediate action you choose, including self-harm. Additionally, the minds of all nearby enemies are sent ringing, and they’re left stunned or staggered.